The suffering serves its purpose
It shapes you
It deepens you
It transforms you
And then there comes a time
The perfect time
Where it must be dropped
Like a hot coal
The chrysalis breaks open
And you emerge brand new
Tag: healing
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The ghost
That's what the problem is
It's being around a person that makes me feel so unseen, so unloved
Like a ghost
It triggers the most primal revulsion in me
It stems from the beginning
From the time when I was most vulnerable
When I was supposed to be nurtured
When I was supposed to learn how to trust
Crazy no matter how far I've come
One holiday around her
Feels like it set me back a million yearsLeave a comment
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From the ground up
Today I was thinking about my desires..
To one day be surrounded by people I love, who love me,
who I feel safe with..
Then it dawned on me..
I don't feel safe with anyone.
Sitting with this for a moment,
I don't get sad like I sometimes do.
Feeling so lonely.
Instead I tell myself the first most important thing is,
I feel safe with me.
I protect me.
I have the power now..
I didn't then,
But I do now.
This is where the work starts..
Knowing that I can be who I needed to show up for me then.
I come to my own rescue.
I build my own strength from the ground up.
Growing up we sometimes don't get the protection from the people that are supposed to protect us. Sometimes the people closest to us are the ones who harm us. This is not our fault. Our younger selves do everything they can to survive. Wounds can be deep and painful.
It starts with baby steps, learning to love ourselves. Something we may have never been shown how to do or taught. Learning to love ourselves also means protecting ourselves. Not abandoning ourselves to please others. Not putting others needs before our own. Not exposing ourselves to harmful people or situations that don't have our best interest at heart.
Our mental health, our safety, our happiness is our responsibility. Which can feel daunting, but actually it is empowering. We get to choose now. Be a warrior and fight for your life. Be decisive. Choose you. You can heal. You can be happy. You can experience genuine love. And you absolutely deserve the best things life has to offer. Thoughts?Leave a comment
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The deeper the valley life carves in you,the higher youcan soar.Leave a comment
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Oh this life almost dragged me under
For a split second I forgot who I was
Then I remembered I am the stardust, the buzzing bee,
the mountaintop
I am all and all is me
Whole and made in perfection
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The Only Power
Fear arises
And then I feel afraid of the fear
That it will take me over
Like a tsunami that arises before me
In a formidable black wall
Growing growing
Arching over menacingly
Moving towards me at a quickening pace
I turn to run
Like I have so many times
Terrified
Sure to be consumed
Something in me stops this time
I close my eyes
I ask you Great Spirit for your hand
I ask for your protection
I seek your Light amidst this total darkness
The Light I know
which gives life to all
You answer in a most gentle way
Showing me first a glimmer,
then guiding me to watch it expand
until it fills me
And when I start to overflow in your Light
You tell me to open my eyes
To show me everything lit up,
sparkling and dancing
"This is power" you whisper
"The Only Power"Leave a comment
The Golden Thread 
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